Poem-Innocence Lost

Mistress said I should post my poem for all to see so here it is folks. It is our hope that maybe by posting it that it will help someone.

Innocence Lost

So young, so innocent.
Just a tender young child.
Wanting to be loved.
Wanting hugs.
Needing affection

You broke her.
Why? what did she do?
Did she hurt you?
Why did you rape her?
A young child of two.

You robbed her childhood.
You stole it away.
Like a thief who did not care.
You left a shattered little girl
One with mixed up thoughts

A little girl who thought she was bad.
Who thought she was unworthy of love.
She thought she did not deserve happiness.
All she wanted was to die, to escape.
To escape from the rape and from you.

You locked her in the closet.
Locked her there because she ran.
Hours and hours.
In that tiny little space.
You left her there all alone and scared.

That little girl is now grown.
And you are long since gone.
But your actions still haunt her.
They torment her and make her cry.
You see, that little girl still lives inside.

Though you still haunt the little girl.
You can no longer hurt her.
Slowly she is learning.
Learning she is worthy of love.
You broke her, Others have mended her.


slave debbie copyright(c) 2007

A FunTASKtic Weekend!

This has been one very busy weekend. Alot of fun too. Since Thursday I have done four tasks at the Org. Two of which were writing tasks for Mistress. I absolutely Love tasking for her. Not just because she is my Mistress and I love her but also she is very creative and really makes you think. One task was a story about being invited to her playroom for a surprise. It was alot of fun and I tried to just let my imagination soar. It was a great task and I really enjoyed it.

The second writing task I did for Mistress was a Favorite Poem task. I don't really read much poetry so I selected one that I wrote for another task of her's a couple years ago called Getting In Touch With Your Feelings. My poem is titled Innocence Lost and was about the abuse I suffered as a child and how he can no longer hurt me. And, even though he hurt me others have mended me. I am considering sharing it here on my blog but have not decided yet.

The third task was another one for Miss Marie. Wow this one was a challenge! Especially when combined with my fourth task. For Miss Marie's task I edged for her in the morning after saying the mantra and no more touching until i had left 12 notes in various places stating that my pleasure belongs to Miss Marie. It required a great deal of creativity but I was also extremely horny and just aching to cum. That however was not allowed until twelve notes had been placed and then with the thirteenth I wiped up some of my cum with it and left it behind in the public rest room. *blush*

The fourth one is Anal Retentive weekend and I have been wanting to perform this one for a very long time now. Doing it in combination with the other task increased my horniness by probably about ten fold. I was very aware of my submission and the tasks that were at hand. As of this post the plug is still in and will remain in until Monday morning.

As ya'll can tell I LOVE tasking. I would even call my self a bit of a task-a-holic. LOL. As soon as I complete a task I am in search of another. In fact I need to go look for another one right now. TTFN!

I Did It!!

Sometimes i really amaze myself. I just completed a task at The Org in which i had to cum 13 times within 3 days. I know your thinking easy. Nope it was a challenge even for a horny cum slut like me. The challenging part was not cumming 13 times. I could do that in one day. The challenge was coming up with 13 different ways in which to do it and being creative.

Even though i found it challenging it was great fun. I am so glad my wonderful Mistress instructed me to request it from Miss Marie. Just trying to come up with ideas each time was so exciting to me. Knowing that i was thinking of another way i could please Miss Marie and my Mistress aroused me even more. Knowing my orgasms were not my own. They were not for MY pleasure. These thoughts left me in a constant state of being aroused.

This task gave me such a submissive feeling. It was truly a wonderful experience. I am giving up control of my orgasms to Mistress and i know she is working on a task for me just for that purpose. (and no i'm not peeking LOL) I am looking forward to seeing what she has come up with for me though and i know it will be fantastic and help me feel that deep submissive feeling that i so crave.

I have learned so much from her these past few years since i have been her slave. I have grown more than i ever thought possible. Achieved things i once thought impossible. Mistress has always had faith in me though so i guess i need to have a bit more in myself.

Now i need another task. Hmmmm what to do next?

I am very proud of my Pet, She has made me very happy since she became my slave. She has grown so much in the past few years. She still has a ways to go, but I am proud of her progress. I am a lucky Mistress.

Trying

I decided it was about time i start taking better care of Mistress's property. Me. Some of the things I have been trying to do are drink more water and eat better. As for the drinking, for a very long time I have mainly survived on sweet tea and coffee oh and the occasional cappucino or smoothie. I rarely, if ever drank water. No matter how many times people would tell me I really needed to drink more water. Nope, wasn't happening.

I am doing quite well with that now and have changed four of my sweet teas per day to a bottled water instead. OK, so maybe it isn't quite enough water per day yet but it's a step in the right direction. I just hope I can keep it up but i am sure going to try.

The eating better doesn't really mean as for what i eat but how much....I had a gastric bypass four years ago and do not eat much, I can't. But, given the choice I much prefer to fill up on liquid. and that's exactly what I have done....in the past. But no more. I am trying to eat at least 2 meals and one snack per day. For me that is a huge improvement since in the past it might have been one snack and nothing else but liquids. Or, maybe one tiny meal.

I decided though that as Mistress's slave it is about time i start treating her property better. Afterall if Mistress entrusted me with something precious to her to take care of and i failed to take care of it. What kind of slave would I be?

One Lucky Slave

I am such a lucky slave. I mean what more could I ask for? I have a Mistress whom I love and who loves me for me. It doesn't matter that I am not a supermodel. She also knows what is best for me and helps me in so many ways. I have grown so much in the time I have been her slave. I have grown deeper in my submission than i ever thought I would. I now crave, need and desire things that at one time I never would have thought of even wanting at all. I even desire to give up control of things that if someone told me i was ever going to give up control of I probably would have told them they were nuts. I am giving Mistress control of my orgasms. As her slave she will say if and when I can have them and I will have to earn them. She is my Mistress and i am more than happy to give up this control to her.

I am also so very glad that my husband is so supportive of this relationship. He knows it is exactly what I need and he is happy for me. We are even currently discussing moving to her location so that it will no longer be long distance! Now that has that has this slave VERY excited! I mean then i will be able to serve my Mistress real time anytime she wishes me to! i can just imagine being able to sit at her feet. or bring her drinks or her meals or anything else she may desire. Yep I am one lucky slave to have Mistress Dora for my Mistress. *big smile*

7 AM And Still up

Ok it's 7:00 AM my time(central) and I have yet to really get any sleep. I'm not sure exactly why. (I did try to sleep Mistress, really I did.)Maybe it's because I'm horny as hell and can not do anything about it today. You see I am doing a task for Miss Marie, a really wonderful, naughty task. And there is no playing on task day. :( Normally this would not have been a problem for me but the past couple weeks at least I have been such a horny cum slut and just can't seem to stop. I have been cumming several times per day. Does that make me a greedy slave? Hmmm I dunno.

I have been looking forward to today's task. It allows me to be naughty in public yet no one but me knows my dirty little secret. Something I really have alot of fun with *Big Grin* My poor mother-in-law if only she knew the things I have done while having lunch out with her at a restaurant.

Well I guess I better try again to at least get a few hours before it is time to go out. Maybe if i try my special relaxation technique that will work. And No it does not involve a vibe of any kind. LOL

Things That Really Bug Me

• People who think that just because I am a submissive that I am a doormat. Welcome is not printed anywhere on my body!
• Doms or wannabes who IM me and say "on your knees bitch." Excuse me I am NOT a bitch, well not yours anyway.
• People that think I always sit naked at the computer.
• People who know I am collared and try to hit on me anyway.
• Doms IMing me and demanding I show them respect immediately. Umm excuse me respect is earned.
• Fakes, phonies, or wannabes.
• People who email me demanding I send them a naked picture of myself. Heck even my husband doesn't have one. What makes them think I'll give them one?
• When other people try and get away with calling me pet. Sorry folks no go!!!That is reserved for my Mistress. Only SHE calls me that. Anyone else trying is apt to see this pets claws! Disrespecting me like that is being disrespectful to my Mistress and something i wont tolerate for one second.
  

To Achieve Your Dreams Remember Your ABC's

Avoid negative sources, people,places, things and habits.

Believe in yourself


Consider things from every angle


Don't give up and don't give in.


Enjoy your life today, yesterday is gone and tomorrow may not come.


Family and friends are bidden treasures, seek them and enjoy the riches

Give more than you planned to.

Hang on to your dreams.

Ignore those who try and discourage you.


Just do it!

Keep trying no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier.

Love Yourself first and most

Make it happen.

Never lie, cheator steal, always strike a fair deal.

Open your eyesand see things as they really are.


Practice makes perfect.

Quitters never win and winners never quit

Read, study, and learn about everything important in your life

Stop procrastinating.

Take care of your own destiny.


Understand yourself in order to better understand others.

Visualize it.


Want it more than anything.

Xcellerate your efforts.


You are unique, nothing can replace you.

Zero in on your target and go for it!



If there is one thing my Mistress has worked so hard to teach me is that I need to believe in myself and that i am a beautiful person. Beautiful where it counts.....on the inside. This has required much patience on her part since i have been a bit slow to learn this. But i am working on it. I will learn Mistress...promise i will

Welcome!

Hi everyone and welcome to my new blog! I am slave Debbie and as many of you may know a performer at BDSM Tasks(The Org) I was a member way back when it was known as The Academy. That is where I met my wonderful Mistress, Mistress Dora(Known there as Amasterfound) She is an absolutely wonderful Mistress and I love her dearly. My greatest joy is pleasing her and doing as she asks of me.

I have been involved in this wonderfully exciting lifestyle fo just over twenty years now. It is a part of me, it is who I am. That will not change. I have tried many times in the past to "quit" this lifestyle but it won't happen. Everytime I went right back to it just like the time before.

I have been with some wannabes and extremely abusive people in the past but that is water under the bridge. I learned from those experiences and know that it will never happen again.